A very important message from Rainn Wilson

hey, my buddy, Rainn aka Dwight Schute asked me to post this message…
pass it along.
-Kate aka Meredith
Wednesday, August 20th is a truly historic day.
It is Estonian Independence day as well as the day when Sting wed his amazing wife,
the multi-talented and ravishing Ms. Trudie Styler.
The best way I can think of to celebrate Estonian Independence and/or
Sting’s anniversary would be to go out and see my new movie, THE
ROCKER which opens on… you guessed it, August 20.
I won’t beg, but I will tell you in all confidence that if the film
does not make at least $17.29 million in it’s first 5 days of release
they will never ever ever let me star in a movie again. Ever.
Besides spreading the word to your friends and families and myspace
friends, here are some other helpful Rocker promotional ideas:
1) Kidnap strangers and force them to buy tickets at gunpoint.
2) Obtain a grant to round up your cities’ homeless population and
bring them to an ‘educational film’ about a former heavy metal drummer pursuing his dream of rock and roll stardom.
3) Take out a loan and simply purchase EVERY SINGLE AVAILABLE TICKET
OF EVERY SHOWING in your area.
4) Lure strangers into the theatre with the promise of illicit sex
and/or drugs.
5) Tattoo “THE ROCKER, IN THEATERS AUGUST 20” on your forehead.
6) Sit cross-legged in front of your local mall, douse yourself in
kerosene, and threaten to set yourself on fire unless every showing is sold-out and all popcorn is free.
7) Bakesale!
If you pass this email along to 1800 of your closest friends and
family and they pass it to 1800 of their closest friends and family
and if everyone who reads this brings 74 people with them to the multi-plex in the first 3 days of release, I have calculated that 1.7
Billion people will see THE ROCKER, making it the 3rd most viewed film in human history.
Also, it’s funny.
Estonia, Sting and I thank you for your time.
Rainn Wilson






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