(1st photo: Artist Unknown)

MYSTERY CAT TREE UPDATE

As the outside cats’ plans were reviewed it was determined that they should be considered a threat. Since no other plan had been enacted OnlyFatRabbit took it upon herself to cast a spell of protection upon the landing.  It should be noted that even though OnlyFatRabbit is considered the House Psychic, she is not a spell-caster.  Her mind rests predominantly in the realms of math and science. Hence, this spell resulted in a gigantic flowing river of blood that made the entire outside area really damn messy and it looked nothing like the picture in the book. 

Black Black and King James were outraged by the river of blood. Messiness is not the answer, and besides, a river of blood randomly on the second floor landing doesn’t make sense. It causes chaos. Chaos is only cured by the Knight Ducks, but the Knight Ducks were mysteriously absent last night.  They were last seen cohorting around with the STL Cardinals and might have managed to sneak onto the team bus for an overnight trip. The Knight Ducks are expected back before the weekend, but that doesn’t help the situation in the now. 

This river of blood ended up causing the apartment to go into a deep depression since the Knight Ducks were not around to end the chaos. At that moment Prime Minister Imy sprang into action strategically making deals with Black Black and King James behind OnlyFatRabbit’s back resulting in the delivery of a mass amount of thin crust pepperoni and pineapple pizza and chicken wings thereby thwarting any and all plans of the house to eat healthy.  It was eventually deemed acceptable supper fare considering the events of the evening, but still OnlyFatRabbit was dismayed by the blindside. Hopefully, this blindside does not snuff out her torch of life.

threat level – dirty litter box

— signed, Black Black

Cabinet Secretary.

Normally in charge, totally confused by the illogical cat.