Well Chris called early this morning and wanted to go do something today since he took a vacation day from work. We decided to go to Orland Park and do some Christmas shopping and grab some lunch.
We were going to eat at Connie’s Pizza and have the lunch buffet all you can eat pizza. They stopped doing that five months ago. We were left with no choice but to leave and go to Hooters instead. At Hooters, we were watching Sportscenter on one of the TVs and we got to talking about our ALL HATE team for sports. We decided that all sports were open and we would make a team complete with coaches, bench players, captains etc.
For everyone’s reading pleasure, here is the Jim Fannin ALL HATE sports team:
Head Coach – Dave Wannstedt…replace Mike Ditka and ruin the Bears for years. Worst head coach ever.
Assistant Coaches – Coack K of Duke – I despise Duke with a passion and right at the top is Coach K; Mike Holmgrem – due to his time with the Packers and winning Super Bowl and all the times they beat the Bears; Don Mattingly – growing up, John Maddox (a childhood friend) idolized him and I hated him and the damn Yankees
Now for the Players…we haven’t completely thought this through and don’t know what sport we’ll play but football allows more men on the field at one time so we’ll go with our starting 11 and then have some bench players.
Captains (Morris had 4 so I’ll have 4…the top 4 most hated) –
1. Mike Alstott – Brent and others have heard this ad nasuem…Joliet Catholic…1990…36-10 and I will say no more except that I hate Mike Alstott and wish nothing but bad things upon him.
2. Brett Favre – I don’t think I should need to explain this one either…Bear Killer…I’m almost enjoying the Packers being 2-9 more than the Bears being 8-3.
3. Steve McMichael – Left the Bears as a legend and then shit all over it by going to Green Bay to finish his career. Then the MFer tries to return and embrace his Bears roots. I don’t accept that. Then he goes and tarnishes the image of the 4 Horsemen to boot. Steve McMichael is dead to me (credit MarcFusion for that saying)
4. Roger Clemens – Yankees and Astros…my 2 most hated baseball teams…and he just won’t go away, just like Brett Favre.
Rest of the Starting Lineup
5. Christain Laettner – If I cared for UK Basketball 1/4 as much as I care about Morris Redskin football, this jackass would have been a captain…stomps on Sean Woods’ chest and gets to stay in the game because he played for Duke and was the Golden Boy…catches pass, makes 6 juke moves, turns and falls away and makes the game winning shot all in 2 seconds (cough cough)…but at least me had a helluva pro career (everyone should be able to hear me snickering at that one)
6. Rasheed Wallace – One of my favorite memories from my time at UK was watching Andre Riddick double hand choke this jerkoff in the Elite Eight in 1995.
7. Terrell Owens – I can’t stand this f’n showboat. If I were playing for the Cowboys, I’d still be beating his ass for what he did to the Cowboy star at midfield.
8. Craig Biggio – How dare anyone try to put this “I’ll play for 25 years to pad my stats” player in the same league as Ryne Sandberg as a second baseman.
9. Jason Giambi – Perhaps he should have taken some talent shots instead of the steroids (I know he thought the steroids would give him talent) but he got exactly what he deserved for selling out to the Yankees.
10. Randy Johnson – “Hey everybody, forget that I sucked ass for the first 5 or 6 years of my career and consider me to be the best lefty since Koufax”
11. ARod – Most overpaid athlete in the world
Bench Players –
12. Sammy Sosa – he would have started but he left before the game began to get a head start on his season’s over vacation
13. Cade McNown – he sucked so bad as Bears QB that he couldn’t even make the starting lineup of the ALL HATE team
14. Curtis (P)Enis – what a terrific RB you turned out to be for the Bears…see Cade McNown
15. Chad Johnson – he doesn’t make the starting lineup because he is an impostor TO
16. Ahman Green – I had to add another Packer to the team
17. Jeff Bagwell – I had to even out the Yankee/Astros hate
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I was very disappointed with the Morris Herald today. You couldn’t even notice a difference between today’s paper and any other Morris Herald. I was hoping for a good front page to be framed to celebrate the state championship. Oh well.
I guess that about does it for now.
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